Welcome my friends to the year that was.

Political Ads: Face it, they’re always offensive to someone, but particularly silly are the ones that end with a tag line like “Paid for by friends of Joe Blow.” Buying you a few thousand TV ads seems very, very friendly. If a friend asked me to give him a couple hundred thousand dollars, I would have to rethink our friendship. That’s the kind of money you give to an ex-wife, not to a friend. A friend of Joe Blow’s is someone who helps him move. A supporter is someone who gives him money.

Texting: Where r u?

@ a traf ik ak c dnt.

North Korea: And you thought this country was run by a bunch of bozos. North Korea makes us look like a land of geniuses. It’s an entire nation run by Mini-Me. And it has nuclear weapons. There is a solution. Someone has to tell Al Jazeera they saw Kim Jong Il drawing insulting cartoons of Muhammad.

Medical Marijuana: Side effects may include munchies, the urge to be profound and spontaneous laughter. If you giggle for more than four hours straight, call your doctor and ask if he has any left.