As I readied my pack for the hike to Utah’s Mount Timpanogos, I cringed to hear the distant sound of kids and counselors from Aspen Grove Camp launch into what seemed like their twentieth chorus of “Here Comes the Sun.” If I didn’t leave this trailhead soon, that song was going to be stuck in my head all day. I had to resist the urge to shout back, “Look, the sun came already! Do we need to summon the ghost of George Harrison to confirm this observation?” Bah. Mormons are too cheery to be allowed to go out in public.

At least the homebrewed legend of Timpanogos had a respectable element of tragedy to it. In ages past, the Timpanogots Ute tribe was suffering from an unrelenting drought, and the Princess Utahna was chosen as a human sacrifice to appease their angry god. She left her village, climbed the highest peak and was prepared to throw herself off, but a young brave from a neighboring tribe named Red Eagle spied her and begged her not to jump. Utahna thought Red Eagle was the Great God of Timpanogos, and the brave hesitated to enlighten her, because he had fallen in love, and to speak the truth would mean her death. If he returned with Utahna to his village, his deception would likewise be revealed, and she would carry out her sacrifice.