I don't know how, but I have managed to get through an entire day without having a pumpkin spice latte.

I've also avoided pumpkin spice french fries, pumpkin spice muffins, pumpkin spice soup, pumpkin spice sunflower seeds, pumpkin spice marshmallows, pumpkin spice granola, pumpkin spice pancakes, pumpkin spice beer, pumpkin spice donuts, pumpkin spice beef jerky, pumpkin spice potato chips, pumpkin spice ice cream, pumpkin spice M&Ms, pumpkin spice butter, pumpkin spice jam, pumpkin spice quinoa, pumpkin spice Jell-O, pumpkin spice hair mousse, pumpkin spice egg rolls, pumpkin spice juice, pumpkin spice curry, pumpkin spice cannolis, pumpkin spice gnocchi, pumpkin spice fudge, pumpkin spice crepes, pumpkin spice scones, pumpkin spice bread, pumpkin spice cookies, pumpkin spice oatmeal, pumpkin spice syrup, pumpkin spice cheesecake, pumpkin spice hot chocolate, pumpkin spice truffles, pumpkin spice waffles, pumpkin spice pie, pumpkin spice cornbread, pumpkin spice moonshine, pumpkin spice liqueur, pumpkin spice martinis, pumpkin spice smoothies, pumpkin spice crackers, pumpkin spice coffee creamer, pumpkin spice French toast, pumpkin spice sangria, pumpkin spice chickpeas, pumpkin spice fritters, pumpkin spice psoriasis cream, pumpkin spice popcorn, pumpkin spice sticky buns, pumpkin spice Oreos, pumpkin spice chili, pumpkin spice croissants, pumpkin spice s'mores, pumpkin spice mac and cheese, pumpkin spice hummus, pumpkin spice macarons, pumpkin spice grilled cheese, pumpkin spice lasagna, pumpkin spice risotto, pumpkin spice Chex Mix, pumpkin spice pretzels and pumpkin spice potato salad.

I may have missed a few items, but then, I was only at the mall for 20 minutes.

When I got home, there was a story on the news that there will be a pumpkin shortage this year. I wonder why? Could it be that every other commercial on TV is for pumpkin spice something-or-other?

If the trend continues, can pumpkin spice Coca-Cola and pumpkin spice Big Macs be far behind? How long before we see pumpkin spice Viagra and pumpkin spice air freshener? Soon, teenagers will no longer steal the pumpkin off your porch to smash it; they'll steal it off your porch to sell it. Which brings up another point: How long before we have a spice shortage, too?

After all, does pumpkin have any taste at all, or are we just tasting a healthy shot of sugar, cinnamon, nutmeg, ginger and allspice? Could you leave the pumpkin out altogether and tell the difference?

Now, I like me some pumpkin pie, and look forward to having it every Thanksgiving and Christmas. But when did the frenzy over pumpkin spice hit such a fever pitch? Five years ago, you couldn't find pumpkin spice on a scavenger hunt. Now, you can't escape it. We're approaching late-1990s Beanie Babies-level hysteria here.

It's just a guess, but five years from now, pumpkin spice will be something you can't even serve in prison without causing a riot.