Keep Calm and Kerri On: ‘My Moment’

Dear Friends,

I was on a call with NFIB (National Federation of Independent Business) last week to help plan our Small Business Advocacy Day later this month. When we started talking about our event last year, which was held on March 10, 2020 in Albany, it really hit me that we are at our one-year anniversary of the COVID pandemic.

This event was pivotal for me, and when I think about the first day of the pandemic, I always think about this day. It was unusually quiet in Albany; many of the businesses and representatives that had planned to attend our Advocacy Day cancelled. Some of the elected officials we were supposed to meet opted out, or stayed home due to growing concerns. We weren’t wearing masks yet. In some meetings we shook hands, others we elbow bumped. It was surreal to be in Albany on this day and to see how this was unfolding in our state. In fact, the New Rochelle “hot spot” was at the head of the news cycle, that ripple effect still unknown.

I look back at the photos with our determined and passionate group from the Southern Tier. Along with Unshackle Upstate and the Chamber Alliance for New York State, we met with Senator Akshar, Assemblyman Crouch, Assemblywoman Lupardo and Senator Borrello. We had no idea what was coming and other than a vague reference to the growing concerns about COVID, that was not the focus of conversations that day. In fact, we barely mentioned it. Seems crazy now … definitely a “If I only knew then what I know now” situation.

We had no idea that within two weeks, our schools would be closed, everyone would be scrambling for supplies, and that virtually everything in New York State would come to a stand-still.

It is chilling, my friends. Putting myself back into the mindset of these early days and weeks. The uncertainty of what would happen, how this would unfold, and when it would end. I don’t know about you but I often said it felt like I was in some end of the world movie, and it didn’t help that I kept thinking about ‘Outbreak’ and ‘The Stand’.

The other day Gracie asked me if March had a “Friday the 13th”. I asked her why and she said, “Everything went bad last year on Friday the 13th, so this year on the 13th it will all go away, right?” I wish I could have told her that her logic made perfect sense, and yes, it would all go away like a reset button. For her, Friday, March 13th was a day her world fell apart.

We all have our moments of when this became real. While Small Business Day was my “uh oh, something is seriously wrong” moment, it wasn’t my “I am really scared” moment. That hit me a few weeks later.

At Commerce Chenango, we were doing our best to stay ahead of the updates, news, guidelines, shut downs, who was essential, and helping our businesses and community members understand what was going on.

I was so focused on this; I wasn’t paying attention to some other things. One of which was the reports of hoarding. I wasn’t oblivious to it. I saw some reports of stores with long lines, photos of empty shelves, a few friends made reference to not being able to purchase some items they needed, like toilet paper, but I had (stupidly) assumed that this was more of an issue in bigger cities. That it would be no problem restocking, and just like when we know we’re getting a snow storm and everyone goes crazy buying bread and milk, it would get restocked soon. I also (again, stupidly) thought, that it would never happen here.

I was wrong.

This leads to my scared moment. A few weeks into all of this, I got home after a long day and went upstairs to say hi to Grace. She was white as a ghost and had a panicked look on her face. I asked her what was wrong, and she said “Mom. There isn’t any more food at the stores. What are we going to do?” I asked her why she thought that, and she showed me a video that someone took at a grocery store, shelves bare, people acting crazy and fighting over items. I tried to explain that people were scared and were doing what they needed to so they could feel safe, and that she had nothing to worry about. Then the questions started … “How bad is it?” “Is there a cure?” “If it’s not safe for me to go to school why are you and dad going to work?” I did my best to explain and make her feel better. Finally she looked at me and asked “Are we going to die?”

My stomach sank. I realized that as much as I tried to shield her from what was going on, she was getting bits and pieces of information, and making her own judgements. For one bone-chilling second, I thought to myself “I honestly don’t know”. That was it. My moment.

We all did the best we could with the information we had, and while it seemed to change day-to-day (sometimes hour to hour), here we are a year later.

Lives were lost.

Businesses were changed forever.

Our children’s lives were altered.

If it feels like you lived through a war, it’s because you did.

It’s not over, but we are on the right path, and we pulled together in way that has changed us forever and I think, for the better.

Over the coming weeks I am sure you’ll hear a lot talk about the one-year anniversary of the COVID pandemic. Everyone has their own story to tell, and ways that they have survived and coped. Whether you were on the frontlines, made masks, shopped for those would could not, volunteered, did your part by staying home and avoiding large gatherings, or have been or plan to get the vaccine, thank you for your part in our recovery.

This is one anniversary I am happy to celebrate.

~Kerri